ok..figured it was time for an update

miss gracie lou will be one at the end of this month and i just can NOT believe it. i am in total denial.
the past month has brought many joys and hurts and i am learning to be thankful for both. i have reconnected with some friends from long ago and was able to get out of the house and actually sit through a movie and go out to eat afterwards. imagine that....no movie interruptions and HOURS of talking afterwards. it was nice and it has been amazing how God places people back in our lives JUST when we need them....which leads me to my hurts. i went to the ER with major abdominal pain and bleeding and found out there that i had just experienced a miscarriage...i can't even write what went through my mind, but i can tell you that i was pretty angry and upset. i then found out that if derek and i want to have any more kids we should try within the next 6 months because they want to take everything out. are you kidding me???!! we have THOUGHT about one more...just at the off chance we have a boy and i can have my Jakob Ryder and he can have a boy, but we certainly did not want one right now. the Lord has taken me to many places the past week and i can finally say that i am emerging all right. i am stronger and i look at life a lot differently....especially when it comes to my precious kids ;)
back to the brighter side of things...gracie lou will be one at the end of the month and we are soooo excited to get her a wooden kitchen and play food and pots and pans and everything to go with. she LOVES to be in the kitchen and i am sure she won't play with it once, because she will be following around derek or i as we cook. lol.
we are not doing anything big...just a small family afternoon with cake ;)
another side note. i am attempting to cook something different every day of the week except weekends and i will let you know how it goes. this week i loved our italian burgers and pasta and next week there holds great new things also. its a great feeling cooking for your family(not to say i just love it all the time...it is a chore for me..i am the baker in the family, but i am doing this because derek is just soooo tired when he comes home from work that he doesn't need to be adding cooking and dishes to his agenda). in my notes section of my facebook i will be posting recipes. i am going to try and post them all.. bare with me, as i have a million things going on, but i will do my best. ;) love to all.